In preparation for this post, I looked up the definitions of receiving. There are many, therefore I will clarify about which kind of receiving I am talking about: to get or be given something; to react to something.
How is it for you if someone gives you something? Let’s say it is something small in value. What is going on in your head? What thoughts are crossing your mind? Do you feel you have to give something to the person in return? Are you now obligated to the person? How is it if the value is larger? These thoughts are part of, what is called the ‘give and take’ program. We all have experienced it. We all had to deal with the attached agenda, the attached expectations.
Let’s go back. Again, you are given something. Can you receive it without going into a sense of obligation? Can you receive it with just gratitude for what has been given? You are aware that there is no attached agenda, without any expectation to get something from you in return. Can you receive that? It’s called ‘gifting and receiving’.
Let’s change the scenario a bit. Someone is angry with you, is judging you. Can you receive this without a felt need to defend yourself, without getting angry or judgmental yourself? Can you receive this while also being keenly aware of where the other person is coming from, that it has nothing to with you, yet everything with the other person? There are some who teach not to take anything personally because everything said comes from the perspective in which the other sees the world around them. They see you through their lens, not you as you are. Only someone who is without judgment can see you for you. Then I usually feel naked which I do not mind in such a case, rather I am grateful for it.
Then, there is the scenario of how you receive yourself. Can you be really honest with yourself, not judge yourself? We learn from early on that we have to judge ourselves or be judged by others, so we can improve ourselves. This is messed up from my perspective. First of all who decides how I am supposed to be. How much judgment does that involve and how much does that version of me have anything to do with who I am? We get entrained to judging ourselves which never allows us to be as great as we actually are. So we consistently play small. Everything else that has to do with us has to stay small too. That means we can not have a really great relationship, a really great job, make / have a lot of money without feeling guilty. It takes the joy out of living.
I wonder. How different might our lives be if we were truly receiving; receiving the contributions of other people, of pets we have, of the earth? How much joy and laughter would there be in us? How much ease would we have in our lives, how much money that we could use to change realities for others? Would you be willing to learn how to receive to have a life that becomes greater and greater?
We think that we can receive. In my own life, I found out that this is not so. We learn to put up our walls to protect ourselves from being hurt by others. Only, these walls work; they do not let anything in nor anything out. Think about that for a moment.
One of the ways I learned to receive was through Access The Bars. If you are interested in finding out more about them and to watch two videos, check out my page about The Bars and a post I wrote about the benefits of receiving The Bars